W30D8

I'm sure I mentioned this the other day, but I've been listening to some of the interviews available through PaleoCon for the past week. I definitely recommend heading over there now to check out the interview with George Bryant of Civilized Caveman before the interview gets removed from the website. Go now! It's a really personal interview that covers some of George's struggles to turn his life around and be happy and healthy.

While I haven't had the same struggles as George, I've been thinking lately that I have an unhealthy relationship with food. I think about it A LOT, whether it's planning my next meal, or feeling bored or upset and wanting to eat something to break up the monotony. I'm also pretty terrible at moderation. One of my "healthier" weaknesses is dried mango. I used to dislike the taste of mango, but I learned that I am kind of obsessed with unsulphured, unsweetened dried mango. And though a serving size is maybe a couple slices, I can down an entire bag in one sitting, which is something like 4.5 servings. While I'm devouring the mango, I mentally tell myself Okay, this is your last piece. You really are full. You don't need another piece. So I stop, for like 15 seconds, and then I'm reaching in the bag again to grab more mango. Before I know it, the entire bag is gone and I'm left feeling slightly over-full, but also craving more. Hello, sweet tooth! It's a bit ridiculous how little self-control I have sometimes. I'm the same way with chocolate and gluten-free crackers. I can't have "just one."

I feel like I'm programmed for all or nothing. I'm good at restrictions or going hard-core into a sport. But if I let myself slip once and tell myself It's alright, you'll get back on track tomorrow, I start slipping all of the time. I had one piece of chocolate yesterday, so one more today won't hurt. I didn't actually have any chocolate yesterday in case you were wondering. This overeating trend also ties into the fact that sugars and grains are addicting. In one of the PaleoCon presentations today, the interviewee mentioned that sugar is more addicting than cocaine. WHAT?!?! And sugar is in so many things that you wouldn't expect, like bacon. There were at least five people that I talked to this weekend alone who were shocked to hear that there's added sugar in most bacon. Yep. Sorry folks. If I'm buying bacon at the store, I spend at least five minutes reading the labels of all of the brands and end up settling for whichever option is the most organic and is nitrate-free. It's tough. And I think most people in the Paleo world end up buying their meats online, such as U.S. Wellness Meat.

Chocolate Chili

1 lb grass-fed ground beef

1 onion, diced

3 cup bone broth

1 1/2 cup tomato sauce

4 cloves garlic, minced

1 cup grape tomatoes, halved

1/4 tsp allspice

1/4 tsp ground cloves

1/2 Tbls cumin

1/2 Tbls chili powder

1 oz. unsweetened chocolate (pure chocolate is kind of OK by Whole 30 standards if used as a spice, not a sweet)

1 Tbls apple cider vinegar

2 tsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp salt

1/2 tsp ground black pepper

1. Heat 2 cups bone broth and ground beef over medium-high heat in a large stock pot. Cook for 30 minutes or until little liquid remains.

2. Add the remaining ingredients to the pot, stir, and cook covered for 2 hours.

3. Remove lid and cook for another 30-45 minutes or until desired thickness is achieved.

4. Serve with green onion or avocado.

Against All Grain Chocolate Chip Cookies

While I was in Atlanta for Thanksgiving, my parents and I hosted a drinks and desserts event at our home. I threw Paleo out of the window and made my pumpkin trifle and pumpkin chocolate chip bars, to go with the giant tray of chocolate that my mom tossed together and the blueberry-lime cake and fruit tarts that our friends brought. I wasn't intending on partaking in any sweets (I tried, but it's hard sometimes), but because I knew that my best friend's boyfriend is Paleo as well, I did make a batch of chocolate chip cookies, Because I was feeling a tad lazy and didn't want to come up with my own recipe at the last minute, I use the Real Deal Chocolate Chip Cookie recipe from Against All Grain.

It turned out well. Honestly, the people who came over said that if I hadn't have told them about the whole non-grain aspect of the cookies, they wouldn't have known. Instead of grain, the recipe called for almond flour and coconut flour. Personally, they were a little dry/fluffy for my taste (I'm a chewy cookie sort of gal), but they did taste pretty good. I only got the chance to eat one, because everyone else ate the rest, but I do recommend it.

Some things to note about this recipe...

1. The recipe does include dairy - grass-fed butter and dark chocolate. (The recipe uses both Enjoy Life chocolate chips and dark chocolate.

2. The resulting mixture ended up very sticky. I recommend using two spoons to kind of scoop up the mixture, get it roughly golf-ball sized, and then get it onto the parchment paper-lined tray. I'm not sure how to describe the process that I used, but it was kind of like scooping the mixture from one spoon to the other repeatedly until it formed the shape I was looking for. Yeah, that's a terribly explanation, but that's the best I got without a video. Something to work on?

Pumpkin Hot Chocolate

Yum! Pumpkin Hot Chocolate. How can you have Paleo hot chocolate? you ask. Well, I'm happy to help you there. And to incorporate one of my favorite foods: pumpkin. Here goes...

Pumpkin Hot Chocolate

1/2 cup + 2 Tbls coconut milk

1/2 cup pumpkin puree

1 tsp pumpkin spice

2-3 Tbls cocoa powder

1 tsp vanilla

3 Tbls maple syrup

1 pinch of salt

1. Combine the coconut milk and pumpkin puree in a small saucepan over medium heat.

2. Once the milk and puree are completely combined and warm, stir in the remaining ingredients.

3. Serve immediately. It's really thick.

If you don't drink it all immediately, then you can put the rest in the fridge and use it as pudding.  Yeah, that's what I did.

Paleo Chocolate Mug Cake

Clearly I'm on a bit of a sweets kick. Part of it comes down to the fact that I'm trying to use up the food/cooking supplies that I have at my apartment so that I don't have to move the food.

Paleo Chocolate Mug Cake

3 Tbls almond flour

2 Tbls cocoa powder

1 1/2 Tbls honey

1 tsp vanilla

1 egg

1/2 tsp cinnamon

pinch of sea salt

Mix the ingredients together in a microwave-safe mug.

Cook in microwave for 2 minutes. And... you're done. Three minutes of work and you get a cake out of the deal. What's better than that?

When I have no willpower

These past few days have tested my willpower and I have found myself lacking. What happened? Well, I'll tell you...

On Tuesday morning, I had a nice little trip to the orthodontist, where I received a partial retainer. This retainer spans the front six teeth on my bottom jaw and will readjust my teeth which are starting to crowd. Seriously, am I that vain that I want to correct a slight crowding that I promise nobody but me notices? Fortunately, no. Apparently small bottom jaws and jaw clenching runs in my family. And I've noticed my teeth have moved and gotten more crowded over the past 6 months. So I'm trying to be proactive and correct an issue that will only get worse with age by using a removable retainer, which is cheaper and faster than doing something like Invisalign, which would move ALL of my teeth instead of just the front ones. Clearly I am vain enough that I refused to get braces at age 25. Thanks, but no.

So, my orthodontist started by flossing my teeth with sandpaper. Yeah, it's about as exciting as it sounds. The sandpaper floss trimmed down the sides of my teeth to allow space for them to be realigned. Then he ninja-ed this small concoction of metal and plastic onto my teeth. OWWW! It felt like it was wedged into place and never coming out. Anyways, the whole thing took maybe 15 minutes and I managed to get to work (10 minutes away) by 8 when I had a 7:30 a.m. appointment. At least they're prompt, right?

I lasted at work for a few hours before I decided that I needed to eat something, since I hadn't eaten breakfast. (I had forgotten that I had the appointment until 20 minutes before I was supposed to be there. Oops.) I removed the retainer, breathed a sigh of relief, and carefully started eating my Guacamole To-Go. After flossing and brushing my teeth, it was time to reinsert the retainer. Luckily I was in the bathroom for this event, because I totally broke down crying. That would have been awkward at my desk. One of my co-workers was kind enough to give me some Advil, which held me over for a bit, but the pain was enough to drive me to distraction. After struggling to focus on work, I eventually gave up and went home 30 minutes earlier than I intended.

What did I do after leaving work? Went to Whole Foods to pick up some dinner. 

What did I end up getting in addition to dinner? Chocolate almond coconut ice cream, Miles of Chocolate (gluten-free brownie), and dark chocolate covered cocoa nibs. Yep. Within 48 hours of finished 21DSD, I went wild with chocolate. Because I apparently have NO self control when I don't feel well and am in pain. Must work on that. I've had candy since getting the retainer (letting the chocolate melt in my mouth).

And the toughest part? My standby vegetable snacks from 21DSD are too hard. Eating carrots is next to impossible with how sore my front teeth are. And while eating a carrot using the side of your mouth like Bugs Bunny is cool and all, it's just plain ridiculous to try. I've been chewing a lot of things with my molars the last few days. Like the rib-eye steak I ate half of for lunch today.

So what healthy Paleo snacky foods can I have that are light n the chewing front? I dunno. Avocado. Grapes? Pre-cut pear? Suggestions anyone?

Sea Salt Almond Bark

Sea Salt Almond Bark

1 1/2 cup dark chocolate, broken in to pieces, or use chips if available
1/3 cup slivered almonds
1/2 tsp vanilla
2 Tbls coconut oil
1/2 tsp sea salt

1. Heat the coconut oil and vanilla in a small pot over low heat.
2. Once the coconut oil has melted, stir in the chocolate pieces. Keep stirring until the chocolate has melted.
3. Stir in the almonds and 1/4 tsp sea salt.

4. Place a piece of wax paper or parchment paper on a baking pan. Use a spatula to transfer all of the chocolate mixture onto the paper. Spread out the chocolate until it's roughly the thickness you want.
5. Sprinkle the chocolate with another 1/4 tsp of sea salt.
6. Place in the freezer for about 20 minutes.
7. Remove from the freezer and break into pieces.

Chemo - Part 12 - Day 11

Today I had an interesting conversation with my co-workers. We started with the question of when Google was created. I guessed it was late 1990s, but had to google "Google" to find that it was founded on Sep 4, 1998. We then progressed to Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn, the latter of which reminded me of a process department meeting where my manager's manager said that our HR department will know if you update your resume on LinkedIn and start looking at other jobs. Yikes. "Private eyes... they're watching you" (Thank you Hall and Oates). So of course we moved to the topic of job searches and making sure you don't post your college party photos on Facebook, which led to a conversation about fraternity parties and a discussion about Greek Tug and back to fraternity parties. Because GT fraternity parties often had police officers checking ID at the door, we then started discussing the drinking age versus the age you'd need to be to buy a gun. The result of this conversation... Lawmakers don't want you to be drunk when you have a gun. Sounds pretty solid to me. So, summary of the day: Founding of google leads to "don't drink and shoot."

Now for the chemo update: The rash that I mentioned yesterday has spread, enough so that my parents called the oncologist and were told to come in to get it checked out. So it seems unlikely that it's just a heat rash. So add steroid, benadryl, pepcid, and a topical cream to the list of drugs that need to be taken daily. I believe that brings the grand total of daily pills (excluding vitamins) to 9. And for someone who hates taking pills because of how it affects the mind, it's not good news at all. I have a not so pleased parent.

Also, the current blood chemistries have dropped further than what it was before chemo. Here's the current levels with the normal levels in parentheses:
white blood cells: 1.8 (3.8-10.8)
platelets: 62 (153-379) -- [this was at 96 before chemo]
red blood cells: 2.34 (3.75-5)

And for more disappointing news, the doctor today said that because there was bone pain as a result of this first round of chemo, there will be more bone pain with the next round of chemo.

Here's the results of a recipe I found via pinterest at 3.2.1.Paleo, that I tweaked a bit.

Paleo Pumpkin Brownie Swirl

Brownie Batter
8 oz chopped walnuts
1 cup creamy almond butter (no added salt)
1 egg
3/4 cup maple syrup
1/2 cup cocoa powder
2 Tbls vanilla
1/4 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda
2 tsp coconut oil, melted
1/3 cup chocolate chips

Pumpkin Batter
1 cup pumpkin puree
1/4 cup maple syrup
1 egg
1 1/2 Tbls cinnamon
1 tsp baking soda
1/4 cup almond flour

1. Preheat the oven to 350 F.
2. Dump the walnuts into a food processor and run until the walnuts become creamy, like almond butter.
3. Mix all of the brownie batter ingredients into one bowl, and mix the pumpkin batter ingredients into another.

It even looks like non-Paleo brownie batter.

4. Spread the brownie batter into a coconut-oil greased 13"x9" pan. Put spoonfuls of pumpkin batter across the top of the brownie batter. Grab a knife and drag the knife through the pan to mix up the batters and create your swirl.

5. Place in the oven and bake for 45 minutes. Let cool before slicing.
After it bakes:

And here's what happens after it cools.

Chemo - Part 6 - Day 5

It was our last day of cladribine! Thankfully we've survived the first 5 days of chemo without any major issues. Overall the side effects have been tiredness, nausea, and a fogginess in the head, but we've attributed that last one to the anti-nausea meds. When I was talking about the fogginess with a few friends last night, we discussed how one of my friends thinks that the anti-nausea medications generally just makes you tired so you sleep through the nausea and wake up after it passes. I can see that being true. It's kind of the same way with migraine medications, though I'm not sure if it's the medication or the migraine that actually makes me pass out and sleep through the worst part of the migraine. I'd say that I'd experiment with it, but when I have a migraine, testing to see if I can stay awake through it is the last thing on my mind.

Some bone-deep leg pain has also kicked in. I think that's the hardest thing we've dealt with so far. We've tried ice packs, but I don't think there's anything to do for bone pain, besides maybe pain killers? Suggestions, anyone?

Anyways, I appreciate all of the well wishes we've received. It makes me relieved to know that my family has a good support system here in Atlanta. I won't worry as much when I head back to Texas. Our next-door neighbor called earlier today to see when he could bring some grilled goodies for us. And some other family friends have already offered to help out with the transportation to the future chemo treatments.

Last night, I went to Leon's Full Service in downtown Decatur. I ordered the Chicken Sausage, with charred scallion, ginger, baby bok choy, green curry, and fried shallot pickles. It was really yummy. And I had the Bitter in a Bottle cocktail. Go there and try it.

Though I think my friend LF got the best option: Bacon in a Glass, with a side of peanut butter.

Here's another banana-based dessert that I baked last night. It has a very strong banana taste, so if you're like my dad and don't like bananas, then don't make this. I know, it's a really complicated concept... Don't make something you don't like? Go figure.

Two-Way Banana Bread

5 frozen bananas, peeled

6 pitted dates

4 eggs

2 1/2 tsp vanilla

1/2 cup coconut flour

1/4 cup almond flour

1/4 tsp baking soda

1/4 tsp baking powder

2 tsp cinnamon

1. Preheat the oven to 350 F.

2. Put the dates into the food processor and run until the dates have been broken up into little chunks.

3. Cut up the frozen bananas into a separate bowl. Mash the bananas with a fork (you could also put these into the food processor and use that instead of the manual effort needed to mash the bananas with a fork).

4. Mix with the dates.

5. Whisk the eggs, then stir into the banana/date mixture. Add in the rest of the ingredients in order, stirring after each one is added.

6. Transfer to two coconut-oil greased loaf pans.

7. In one pan, stir in 1 cup of chocolate chips. In the other pan, mix in dried or fresh fruit. I used dried blueberries and dried cherries.

8. Transfer to the oven and bake for 30 minutes, or until a toothpick comes out clean. Let the loaves cool completely before trying to remove from the pans.

Cherry/Blueberry

Paleo Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Bars

I think I've maybe finally grown up. Just over a month ago I started listening to NPR instead of pop or country music stations. I now almost exclusively listen to NPR. I never used to follow the news; I hated (and still kind of do hate) listening to politics. My source of the news used to be my mom who would call me to inform me of recent goings-on and my ex who was much more into news and international affairs than me. Now, I actually know what's going on around the world. WHO AM I? I'm still not sure what happened a month ago that caused me to start listening to the news. I went to Portland... Can a city cause someone to start following the news? Unlikely. So that's why I'm thinking that I've finally become a grownup. Seriously, I called my mom and told her that I'm growing up. (Clearly I define being a grownup as listening to NPR.) Oh well, this is a baffling change in habits... I wonder how long it will last.

Now back to the good stuff... My pumpkin kick is still going strong. Very strong. I spend my free time thinking of what new pumpkin recipes to make. Okay, not ALL of my free time, but a lot of it.

A couple weeks ago, I decided to bake a Paleo version of the pumpkin chocolate chip bars that I love so much. It's hard to duplicate, and this is the closest that I've come so far. The more I ate, the more I liked it.

Paleo Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Bars
1 egg
1 cup pumpkin puree
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup almond flour
1 cup coconut flour
2 Tbls pumpkin pie spice
1 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
2 Tbls maple syrup
1.5 Tbls honey
2 Tbls sunbutter (sunflower seed butter)
1 package Enjoy Life Chocolate Chips (dairy-free, soy-free, gluten-free, casein-free, vegan, and kosher)

Preheat your oven to 350F. Grease your baking pan with some coconut oil. Whip the egg with the pumpkin puree, then add the vanilla extract. In a separate bowl, mix the almond flour, coconut flour, pumpkin pie spice, baking soda, and salt together. Mix the dry ingredients into the wet ingredients and then stir in the maple syrup, honey, and sunbutter. Last step is to fold in the chocolate chips. The mixture will be pretty sticky, but mainly just sticks to itself. This is what it looks like:

Transfer to your oiled baking dish,

  ... and bake in the oven for 35-40 minutes.

This is what the non-Paleo version looks like:

Hiatus - Paleo Pumpkin Brownies

Ingredients
1/2 cup pumpkin puree
2 Tbls sunbutter (sunflower seed butter) or any nut butter
3 eggs, whisked
2 Tbls maple syrup
1 Tbls honey
2 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup coconut flour
1/2 cup almond flour
2 Tbls cocoa powder
1 Tbls pumpkin pie spice
1 Tbls cinnamon
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 cup Enjoy Life Mini Chocolate-Chips (Dairy-free, Soy-free, and Gluten-free)

Preheat oven to 350F. Mix all of the wet ingredients together with a hand mixer. Start with the pumpkin puree and the sunbutter, adding each wet ingredient one at a time. Mix in the flours, cocoa powder, pumpkin pie spice, cinnamon, and baking soda. Now, fold in your chocolate chips. Spread in a greased (with coconut oil) 8"x8" baking dish. Bake for 25-30 minutes or until a toothpick entered in the center comes out clean

It even looks good before baking!

So Enjoy Life Mini Chocolate-Chips are made in a dedicated gluten-free and nut-free environment, so you wind up with vegan, kosher, gluten-free, casein-free, dairy-free, soy-free chocolate chips. Intense, huh? Definitely makes you wonder what's left. And since you're wondering, I'll let you know: evaporated cane juice, chocolate liquor, non-dairy cocoa butter.

Nom nom nom...

P90X - Day 16

I didn't sleep well on Sunday night. For some reason, running gave me what I assume is heart burn. I don't actually know what heart burn is, but the pain felt like it was coming from my esophagus. It lasted for about 6 hours, or at least until I fell asleep. So I decided to sleep in until 6 a.m. and do P90X in the evening after I got back from the library. Plus, I feel less guilty for jumping around for Plyo in the evenings. I worry that my downstairs neighbor hates me for jumping on the floor.

Over the weekend I decided to bake my favorite dessert, courtesy of Martha Stewart. The pumpkin makes the bars incredibly dense and yummy. I've always enjoyed baking, and these are by far the most delicious of all of the desserts that I've baked, ever. Unfortunately it's not Paleo. I'm going to attempt to make a Paleo version this next weekend.

Non-Paleo Pumpkin Chocolate-Chip Squares
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 Tbls + a little extra pumpkin-pie spice
1 tsp baking soda
3/4 tsp salt
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, room temperature
1 1/4 cups sugar
1 large egg
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup canned pumpkin puree
1 package (12 ounces) semisweet chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350F. (Optional: Line bottom and sides of a 9-by-13-inch baking pan with foil.) In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, pie spice, baking soda, and salt; set aside.

With an electric mixer, cream butter and sugar on medium speed until smooth; beat in egg and vanilla. Beat in pumpkin puree. With the mixer on low, add the dry ingredients until just combined. Fold in chocolate chips.

Spread batter in pan. Bake until edges begin to pull away from sides of pan and a toothpick inserted in center comes out with just a few moist crumbs attached, 30 to 40 minutes. Cool completely in pan. I find that the bars taste best when cold, so I stick them in the fridge before eating. I brought them into work to share in my all-day, all-week meeting, and I definitely got a few thumbs-up of approval.

Paleo Pumpkin Brownies

It's been a long week. Today I reached 41 hours of work for this week (including the day I spent at work on Sunday). I slept through both of my alarms yesterday because I was out late on Monday. I have a 7:30 meeting tomorrow morning. The back tire on my 2-month-old car is slowly losing air. I'm frustrated to say the least. So by the time I got home, I was stressed and wanted to fall back on my typical splurge on sweets stress-relief technique. I ate one of my Riesling-Pear Popsicles, but it wasn't enough, so I decided to attempt to whip up some dessert with my limited sweets. I think the sweetest things that I have in my apartment right now are fruit, dried fruit, and wine. I didn't want any of those (the dried fruit mix I have is just too sugary). It turned out okay. It's not the best dessert that I've ever baked, but it's as good as I'm going to get right now. It doesn't have a big pumpkin flavor and it gives me a slight reminder of coffee, but it's a decent dessert.

Paleo Pumpkin Brownies

1 cup pumpkin puree

1/4 cup + 2 tsp coconut flour

1 Tbls almond flour

1/2 tsp baking powder

1/2 tsp baking soda

1 Tbls cocoa powder

1 Tbls unsweetened baking chocolate, melted

2 tsp vanilla

2 Tbls coconut oil, melted

2 1/2 Tbls honey

2 eggs

Preheat oven to 350F. Mix pumpkin and eggs together in one bowl, then add vanilla, coconut oil, and honey. In a separate bowl, mix together the dry ingredients. Stir the dry ingredients into the wet ingredients. Put into loaf pan and bake for 30 minutes, or until a toothpick comes out clean.

Rumspringa 5-6-7

For the last few days, I've gorged 

My last non-Paleo recipe...

Definitely Not Paleo Chocolate Chip Cookie - Oreo - Brownies - OMG!

1 pack Oreos

Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough (see below)

Brownie Batter (see below)

Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough
Bowl 1
2 3/4 cup flour
1 tsp salt
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
Bowl 2
2 1/2 sticks unsalted butter, softened
1 3/4 cup packed brown sugar
1/4 cup sugar
2 tsp vanilla

2 large eggs at room temperature
2 cups semisweet chocolate chips

Sift the ingredients of Bowl 1 together. Bowl 2: use a stand mixer with paddle attachment (or hand mixer) to beat the butter, brown sugar, and sugar until pale and fluffy. Mix in one egg at a time, followed by the vanilla Once the eggs and vanilla are incorporated, slowly mix in Bowl 1. After all of the flour has been blended in, fold in the chocolate chips. Cover with plastic wrap and chill in the refrigerator for 1 hour.

Brownie

8 Tbls. unsalted butter
4 oz unsweetened chocolate
1 1/2 cup sugar
1/4 tsp salt
2 tsp vanilla
2 large eggs at room temperature
1 cup flour
2 Tbls natural cocoa
1/2 cup white chocolate chips

Melt butter and chocolate over low heat. Cool slightly and transfer to different bowl. Mix in sugar, salt, and vanilla, followed by the eggs, one at a time. Beat in flour and cocoa. Fold in white chocolate chips.



Preheat oven to 375 F. Spread the cookie dough along the bottom of the pan and top with a layer of Oreos.

Spread the brownie mixture over the Oreos. Cover with hot fudge

Bake in oven for 40 minutes or until center is baked through. Let cool and then eat!